It hit me. The HOLY CRAP I'm really doing this! I don't even have a departure date set and I'm already feeling panicked.
I started thinking about all of the things that I will need to accomplish before I leave:
- Open a Charles Schwab bank account (considered by travelers to be the best bank account for travel, they reimburse your ATM fees)
- Get some vaccinations (probably, depending on where I plan on going.)
- Figure out at least SOME of where I'm going
- Sell my car? (If I plan to be gone long term, this seems like the smart move)
- Entrance visa for at least my first destination
- Buy travel insurance (a must for travelers!)
- Buy a few travel related health and safety items (locks, door stop, whistle etc)
- Actually purchase plane tickets and book initial accommodation
All of that can feel like a bit much, but honestly I think what really got to me was a panic about money. I'm pretty sure it all started with the realization that my current Bank of America account has a minimum balance requirement. That just cut into my travel fund!
I really ought to calm down because the truth is that I can simply close that account. If I want a separate savings account to store some cash while I'm off, I'm probably better off opening a CD or something that might get at least a minuscule amount of interest anyway.
So okay, I'm starting to talk myself down. But DAMN, it's amazing how easily and quickly I can freak out!
I'm trying to trust life. I'm trying to trust the words of all the wonderful travel bloggers out there who promise that it will be alright, that I will figure this out as I go. I'm also trying to remind myself that anytime I've started a new adventure, whether it be stateside or overseas, even though it ended up being AMAZING it was terrifying and tough at first.
I suppose that is the way of truly worthwhile experiences. They move you out of your comfort zone and into a place where you can grow.
I have a notoriously chatty mind. Trying to get it to just shut up and be quiet already is not easy. But maybe I shouldn't be trying to fight it as much as work with it. Maybe learning how to embrace the part of me that over-thinks instead of wishing I would just chill out is the key.
An ability to think about different possibilities and plan for those possibilities is actually a strength. It is just the fear and paralyzation that can come with it that is the problem.
Perhaps that is the lesson: getting the head, heart and gut to all work in tandem.